it's over!

Yipee - I do love Christmas, but this year was tight, and that makes me feel crap! But the girls were pleased with their gifts and I've heard no complaining, so all is good.
We've all been sick, apart from T'Keyah, so far, she's the only one that has escaped it - nasty cough, and feeling like junk!!
I got nothing scrapwise for Christmas - nothing, nada zilch!! So I've got myself some stuff hehe - just opened my Xacto knife, lethal looking thing that is too...should have some fun with that one this arvo.
We have the most gorgeous little dog staying with us for a couple of weeks - Bentley has been really good with her (well..apart from trying to ride the wee girl, and not getting it when she snaps his face off - male thing huh?!)
The days are gorgeous lately...we had a spectacular thunder & lightening storm the other night - great stuff!!! I can deal with have a superb day and rain at night!
Rigtho - have to hit the supermarket - our cupboards are bare!

who would've guessed

that panadol suppositories cost so much?! $17.20 they stung me yesterday, thank goodness they work a treat though! Thankfully today, her temp has gone (isn't that along the lines of Murphy's Law...I go buy supplies, and she looses the temp) but she's still coughing and has boogers for africa...ugh!! Hopefully by Sunday, she'll be over the worse and heading back to health.
I'm trying hard to remember to pick T'K up at 12 - I'm then going to head up to Elena's and buy myself some scrapping supplies - call it a Christmas gift! I'm just hoping she's got what my head thinks she should have! LOL
I went to pick up 2 laybuys last night, first one was a total success...second one, not so much - actually they have no record of it at all!! So I threw a wee fit, and walked out! So Molly is minus a dolls pram - and I'm gutted because the shop still has it, but I'm not paying $90 for a dolls pram!! Saw another last night, in a different shop, but it was a little tooooo pink - I love pink, but this was slightly nauseating! So will go and check out a few more shops and prices later on...I think I'm sort of lucky that Molly really has no clue what is going on - oh, I got the cutest thing yesterday for her, an elmo potato-type head toy, which talks! Can't.Wait to play with that one! See him there >>> too too cute! I have to remember to find out what toys need batteries and have a supply sitting here, I hate not being able to use something because we have no batteries. T'K is another kettle of fish - I honestly thought as they got older, it'd be easier to buy - ah, wrong, so very very wrong! I mean there are only so many CD's and clothes one 12 year old can have! I have got her a new duvet, pink and brown no less - and she has no clue about that one - so at least there will be some element of surprise! I don't buy her clothing without making sure it passes her standards - it's so not worth it. Jeepers - only 45 minutes before I have to collect her, suppose I should go and get slightly more organised that I am, and I could sort out the washing situation too - looks like it's going to clear again today and be another nice afternoon - well we can live in hope, it is summer after all!!

Sleeping Beauty

Poor wee poppet, Mops had a good day at kindy, but her ESW teacher commented in her book about Molly yawning and looking tired...and when I went to collect her she looked shattered, was really hot too, but I can't be 100% sure whether it was the heat or she did have a temperature. Came home and stripped her down so she was just in a nappy and singlet and gave her some pamol (via her little butt, seeing as she point blank refuses anything orally! Very challenging little princess!) and she crashed within 5 minutes, and slept for about 90 minutes. Came out from her room (daddy carried her down halfway through her sleep) bright as a button...she has a bit of a cough, but other than that, she's as chipper as!!
Ohhoohh, I got scrapping mail today - nothing better than a parcel full of goodies, but this one is stashed away, it's my little something from Tarisota http://www.tarisota.com.au I can't wait till I can open it! Also can't wait till the credit card is a little less rubber like, and I can shop there and buy myself some yummy goodies!
Had a lovely run-in with the sister in law over the weekend, charming little verbal attack she had for us too....both T'Keyah and I, so needless to say, T'K is slightly shattered by it and has decided to spend Christmas Day with her Dad (after the morning with us) and we've decided to spend the day with Craigs parents...it's ugly! lol
Oh and I'm being brave and have taken the plunge into submitting to magazines...have submitted to one so far (LOL, so very brave!!)

To a dear friend...

today is 10 years since Patrick died...I hate today, I always feel so blue leading up to the 16th...it was nice to see some memorials in todays paper...Greg put one it, I often feel for him, loosing his best mate. I have such fond memories of Pat at school...he was such a character, always out for a laugh, yet he was such a loving and caring person. Certainly a huge loss, one that I wish we didn't have to go through, rest in peace Patrick, you're still loved and missed by us all! xx

Why...

do Monday's seem to be the longest day? And the day that I end up with a nightmare of a headache...the bird can't quit screeching, the dog is barking at his own shadow, and I'm slowly going nuts!

dallas

Oooh - I shouldn't be on here, but I am, hehe. I'm getting so inspired by reading other Blogs, not only to blog more, but most of the blogs I read are scrapper's blogs...I have ideas in my head, but getting them out and stuck down can be a whole other problem! But, seeing as the days are drawing closer to the BIG DAY, I seriously have to get something done!! I'm off to see SIL soon, and getting her to give me 2 favourite photos of each of her sons...I'm going to do scrap canvases....1st attempts and all! Mind you, she didn't exactly have the reaction I thought she'd have over the 12x12 album I did of all the boys last year!
Oh, and if you are reading and you want to see what did kick me in the arse for inspiration here it is http://www.tarisota.com.au/ (edited to add the link, which mysteriously vanished!!)

How the heck do you get out of a funk?? I know exactly when it happened and why - which helps, but doesn't, KWIM?? On Wednesday the social worker from Vera Hayward came over to discuss Molly and her therapy...or lack of said therapy. Molly spends 85% of her session, screaming and trying to get out of the therapy room...and the therapist keeps asking me how I deal with her when she's having a tantrum like that, she doesn't get that we don't have tantrums to that scale at home...it's either the clinic, the room or the therapist, and now hopefully we will begin the elimination process.
So I ended up talking a lot about Molly's diagnosis, or lack of....and it brought a lot of things to the surface, some I can deal with, others not so much.
I was fine all afternoon, kinda, but we got through it....then around 5pm it hit me, and I lost it - it wasn't pretty either, but I was completely shut away and just let it happen...though it flowed into Thursday and I can still feel it today.
Bah...wish it'd go!

the other layout...

I did manage to do two layouts on Monday, but because I was on the final day of the EarlyBird course, I didn't manage to upload it...
I had loads of fun with the sewing machine, and the reason I haven't used the machine on a layout is because I had no clue where the power cord was!
Right, have to fly, have an appointment at the hospital at 10am - thank goodness the woman from reception rang yesterday, because I had no clue we even had an appointment!!

Shell's blog challenge Nov 21st-27th

Name 5 things you would do if you had a magic wand and explain why.

1. Have an endless bank balance, one of those ones that no matter how much I take out, the balance remains the same.
2. Win huge(!) in lotto - see #1.
3. Buy our own house, because I'm so tired of looking at grotty rentals and shifting house
4. Solve the worlds problems (wouldn't that be nice!)
5. shift the weight that I seem to carry everywhere (and I don't mean Molly :o) )

Could it be, possibly, I think it could be....yup, a layout!! After goodness knows how long since I actually sat and completed a page, today was the day. Possibly helped by the fact that it's a) raining like no-ones business b) both girls are home for the day with a revolting cold - whatever it is, I hope it decides to stick around, because I don't mind being able to achieve some results!!

Like I said, both girls are at home with a cold...I woke up far too many times last night, hearing one of them cough...poor Molly was the worst last night. And worst even today, she missed out on Kindy Photos!! I'm really sad, was really looking forward to her photo with kindy - never mind, Trish said they'd try and get a nice shot of her for us, and I'll still by the group photo for her. Right, I'm off to tidy the kitchen, T'Keyah just trashed it a beaut! and then I might even try another layout! ooohh, two in one day!

Well, we made the move - big changes too....Molly gave the cot up (finally) and is really settled and loving her big bed! Sad thing is though, the duvet hasn't shown up yet - was posted back on the 9th - I've still got my fingers crossed though (lets hope it's just slow postal service!!)
That bird is driving me bonkers! Charlie seems to be a lot more vocal since we've moved - and now that he's hanging from the roof, he thinks it's entertaining to chuck seeds at you while you're on the computer! The picture is of Charlie - it's an old one though, he's now sporting a bright yellow head! Apparently a sign of maturity - yeah right! Think someone needs to tell Charlie that!
I should really go and unload some more boxes, but I'm so sick of it!! Think I'll concentrate on my scrapping area, yes area - I don't have a room (boo-hoo) so I've got to think carefully and make it look boring and uninteresting to keep Molly away! Speaking of Molly, she's sitting watching the Holey Doleys (insane little men really) and is copying them being a washing machine! Very cute! Molly, not the creepy men!

and to catch up completely here is Challenge #3

I ask each of you to choose a letter of the alphabet and answer each of the following with a word/group of words that begins with the letter you've chosen... ie say I chose the letter "M"... a color would be MAGENTA, a song would be MONY MONY by Billy Idol and so on Get it? Right here they are:-
1. Name one color. Pink
2. Name one song. Please release me!
3. Name one movie. Pretty Woman
4. Name one vehicle. Peugeot
5. Name one food. Pineapple
6. Name one household item. Piano
7. Name one book. Princess' Diaries
8. Name one scrapbook related tool Paper Cutter
9. Name one animal Pony
10. Name one country/place Palmerston

slipping on the blog challenges from kiwiscraps! Here's challenge #2

10 CD’s/songs that you just have to have if you got stranded on a desert island

1. Robbie Williams - live at knebworth
2. Counting Crows
3. Boney M
4. James Blunt
5. ABBA
6. Aqua (gotta have something a little lively)
7. Gun's & Rose's
8. Time to say goodbye (incredibly sad song, but beautiful)
9. Gwen Steffani
10 Enya

Crumbs...we move on Saturday and have about 6 boxes packed!
Oh bums, I've just won an auction on TradeMe...(see left) prolly shouldn't have kept on bidding, but since an awesome friend does the best pictures, and she has the exact same material, I had to have it! Molly's new room will look totally cute, all co-ordinating! Will post some pictures when it's all together.
Might even switch the girls beds, - or not, T'Keyah would probably rip my head off....but then again, if I can do a deal and get her a pink headboard....hmmm, there could be a deal in there somewhere!
Oh yeah, T'Keyah is obessed with pink, baby pink to be specific - and to tell the honest truth, I'm pretty partial to baby pink myself! Would love the girls to have rooms that they love being in (means I might see less of them hehehe) I only signed on to win the auction, and I'm still here - sheesh, and the boxes aren't packing themselves (unfortunately!).
I had my second session with the EarlyBird programme yesterday - still great, and I'm delighted in the progress Molly is making, she said UP at kindy the other day, she seems to be listening much more, and following on with instructions. Some of the things we're learning over the next few sessions are based around the ABA programme, so I'm really interested in that!

I'm going to try and be more diligent about posting here - I find when I do write things down, I feel a little calmer in daily life (especially at evening time, I get so short with the girls) and Kiwiscraps have posted a blog challenge, which I think I'll follow, so here goes with challenge number one!!

1. Name one productive thing you accomplished this past weekend.
Ha, that would be producing some layouts at an all day crop!!
2. Name two things that you look forward to doing.
Shopping without children
soaking in a huge bubble bath
3. Name three things that gross you out.
Vomit
Spiders
Beetles (huge black ones)
4. Name four things that you normally do on a daily basis.
Change nappies
Shower
Surf the internet
kiss my girls (though the bigger one is starting to avoid them!)
5. Name five things that you own that you think you could get rid of and not miss.
the kids (JOKING!)
at least two pairs of shoes (that I have NEVER worn)
Iron
Iron board
Pizza stone (far far easier to dial out!)

I had a brilliant day - an all day crop (10am-6pm) and it certainly shook me out of my funk with layouts. They aren't complete, but will finish them off over the next couple of days with journalling....I so enjoy getting out, hanging with people with the same interests and having a break in the child/house routine!! Can't wait until the 26th November - it's the mega all day (10 - 8pm) christmas crop, and they rock!!
Molly is doing really well - she even said UP to me on Thursday after kindy - normally I don't like carrying her (she's so heavy!) and make her walk to the car, but she stood directly in front of me, looked up and said UP - so I looked at her and said, only because you said up, I'll carry you...and she said it again for Dad later on.
We're waiting to find out about the therapy that Molly will get - it's going to be intensive, but that is exactly what I want - I reckon this kid needs a real boost and she'll be coming out with more and more words!
Only one more week until we move - I really can't wait - I'm so looking forward to living in this new place, much lighter and brighter (especially the kitchen, this one is so dark!) and NO FREAKING RED CARPET!! When we first moved here I loved the colour scheme - a rich red carpet, navy blue walls and almost white curtains - it does look quite nice - but oh man, the carpet is a killer with the dog and the cat (both have white fur!!) It'll be so nice not seeing white fluff all over the carpet!

I took some pictures of the wee girl the other day - was quite pleased with them too! She's such an adorable little monkey. That's one of them up in the corner.

I had my first EarlyBird session yesterday...talk about brain ache!! It's amazing how much mine hurt - just shows it gets very little use.
I think the course is going to be great...I'm still in two minds about what my girl actually has/is. After talking and seeing the videos of the other children, she does slot into Autism...but then today, she's totally clued on to everything and the only difference is she's non-verbal. This whole rollercoaster is frustrating the living hell out of me. And I can only imagine what it's like for Molly.
I got some great ideas, and insight from yesterday...kinda hanging out for the next one, which is in another three weeks. Don't really know whether Craigs going to be into it....he's really fucking me off tonight...wish he'd just pissthehelloff!! He's not taken much interest in what went on yesterday, hasn't even looked at the books, much less asked me anything about it - T.V. was far more important. I still suspect Rhys has either autism, or aspergers...but thats something Craig doesn't even want to touch...stupid prat. He'd rather just sweep it under the carpet and carry on like life is perfectly ok...which it's far from! Somedays I feel like I'm pushing a lump of turd uphill with a toothpick...

Looking forward to Friday, having a coffee group, and will catch up with the 'girls' who I haven't seen in months!! Will be fabulous...great bunch of chicks with an instant play group! Great for Molly's socialisation too.

Ugh, I haven't been here for ages, and my head is about to explode....I need to make more effort to come in here and get it out!
I'm kinda gearing myself up for Molly to actually be diagnosed as autistic...I know, I said that the psychologist said she wasn't , but there is a meeting being held on Monday (11 October) and I've just got that sinking gut feeling that it's going to be ripped out (the diagnosis)
I guess at the end of the day, it isn't really that bad...but it's not what I had planned for my daughter, KWIM?? There are days that I just want to bury my head in the sand and ignore it - there are days I just want to leave, and not come back, and there are days that I love and adore her so much it hurts!
I feel so incredibly frustrated with everything - her progress is happening, but I don't credit Vera Hayward, or Michelle with any of it. It rips me when I hear of other autistic children, probably ones who are more effected that Molly, making huge progress. Christ, my daughter is nearly 4 - what the hell happens about school??? I don' t want this to effect her all through her life, I want her to have a reasonably good life, and be accepted, and to be honest, the way we're going now, she's going to be a social outcast!! And that breaks my heart
Christine is meant to contact me after the big meeting, so I'll make big decisions then about Molly's therapy, in particular - changing speech therapists.

Woohoo, we're off tomorrow to Christchurch, not really looking forward to the drive, ma's car, no decent sounds and T'Keyah beside me (sheesh!!) lol - the Nationals are being held in Christchurch, and considering this is the first time they've ever been held in the south island, it's a pretty big deal - sooooo looking forward to it. Though on the downside, I leave Molly & Craig here, so thats hard. I so enjoy my break - but miss them like mad all the same. I'm bummed though, that I hardly have any money to take....piss.
I feel down, and I know exactly why, and I'm dealing with it slowly (I think) its a sticky situation and something that I can't even write here - because you just never know.

WARNING - Language is crass!

Poor poppet wasn't a happy camper yesterday - we went to kindy, as per usual, she rocked up, did her name and lunch box, checked out what was on offer and decided she didn't want to stay. We came home, and I started feeling like crap too - could barely keep my eyes open - Molly was really warm to touch too, so I started pumping the fluids. T'Keyah came home at 3ish, and I thought I'd try to catch a nap - but Molly began having a melt-down in the kitchen, so I came out - she was trying to put her sneakers back on (having a shoe obsession lately) so I picked her up and came and sat on the computer chair with her to have a cuddle - she fell asleep!! So we went to the couch and she slept - having huge body jumps though! She slept on and off until 5.30 when Dad took over and I took T'Keyah to marching and went to the supermarket. Came home at 6.30 and she was still napping, so I got PJ's out and panadoled her up (was quite hot) and she was in bed and asleep by 7pm!! She woke up at 3 soaking wet, so Craig changed her and I changed her bed, and she went back to sleep - she was up again at 6.20 for the day, and is fairly chipper and eating loads!! Still in her PJ's and sneakers!!

I was talking with Susan yesterday at kindy and she was relaying a conversation that Michelle and Adrienne had on Thursday - the general gist of it was that Michelle doesn't agree with Christines diagnosis - she's really starting to fuck me off - she's stuck in the mindset that Molly is autistic and won't shift - Maybe it's because my daughter doesn't freaking like you!!!!!!!! Even Susan commented that there didn't seem to be much of a rapport there and Molly was unsettled on Thursday - um yeah, cos that fucktard was there!!!!!! I think it's time we got a new therapist, someone that will give Molly the therapy she needs - not therapy for autism, because she's not freakin autistic!!! I so want to slap that bitch. ARGH!

Well, Christine, the physcologist came on Tuesday, observed Molly and asked questions (loads!) and at the end said "I will get you and Craig in sometime next week to do all the formal side, and I still need to speak to Adele (Cox, the supervising physcologist), but at this stage I think it's inappropriate to diagnose Molly as autistic"
Woo-freakin-hoo!!! I was so thrilled - I wasn't bothered if she was autistic, I was dealing with the fact that she might be, but that mothers instinct kept telling me it wasn't right, and I'm just thrilled to know she's not going to be labelled autistic!! IN YER FACE VERA HAYWARD!!! Craig laughed the other night about being a fly on the wall when vera hayward found the news! I just hope now that Michelle will pull her socks up about the whole thing - and stop focusing on the autistic label and give Molly the therapy she needs. If she's going to be a poop-head about it, I will request a new therapist.
Molly is addicted to Ice-Age - she's adorable how she cracks up at the cartoon creatures antics - where's da baby? Is hilarious!